Modest Meanings

I have this clear memory of a realization that came to me in my mid-20s… life, is high school. All the insecurities, the hidden rules of behavior, the segregation of the different levels of cool, and the full-blown immaturity (that at the time I credited to stage of development but later learned seemed to be rampant at almost any age).

You can see it anywhere around you. At work there are the gossiping, giggling co-workers or the bully who’s somehow become your boss, in your personal life there’s the person who’s mad at you and you don’t know why, the one who runs over to hit you (figuratively of course) then runs away, there’s the party where everyone’s invited except you, there’s pressure from family and friends to do what they think is best and so on and so forth.

But, the example that I think suites this notion best is the dating game, where no matter our age or level of maturity, we all turn into sniveling, insecure, paranoid teenagers. It’s funny really, if it wasn’t so very very sad at the same time. And the worse part is that all these aspects get almost worse as we get older because we are less honest about feeling them and blind to the effects that they inevitably have on the ways we react. In my experience, if you’re not careful, they can do a very good job of sabotaging something you innocently think is under your control and progressing smoothly.

So when a member of the opposite sex tells you that they like you, or does their best to show it in other less obvious ways, take a step outside of the defensive walls and inhale the simple breath of fresh air, cause guess what, being honest and open is an amazingly effective strategy in and of itself and although it might not seem so, the rules of your old high school halls only have as much power as you give them.

Be brave and stop playing.

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